Meeting With Your Ex Boyfriend When You Want Him Back
So your ex boyfriend calls... and he wants to meet up with you. Or maybe you were the one who arranged the meeting, hoping that seeing each other again can bring back old sparks.
Is there a way to repair your romance? Can you and your ex boyfriend still get back together... and even more importantly, should you?
Meeting up with an ex boyfriend is a strange, nervous kind of situation. If you've been trying to get your ex back, you're near the end of a long journey... and the steps you take right now are extremely important. If your boyfriend has been trying to get you back, seeing him could lead to hooking up again - which is something you need to decide you want (or don't want) before even meeting with him.
No matter what, there are certain rules and regulations to follow when it comes to seeing your ex after the break up. Knowing the right moves to make is crucial.
Rule 1: Pick a Casual Place To Meet Your Ex For The First Time
Maybe you've been talking... emailing... or text-messaging back and forth with your ex boyfriend for a while now. If so, you've probably become pretty comfortable. But you know what? Hiding behind a screen or phone is easy to do. Meeting your ex face to face is a lot harder, and you may find yourself at a loss for words. Being comfortable is extremely important, which is why you need to pick the correct place to meet up.
When your ex agrees to see you again, try to meet for lunch or coffee. Both of these events are small, simple, and best of all, quick. In seeing your ex for the first time, you don't want to meet him for dinner - it can go on way too long, and it can also lead to doing something afterward... which you want to avoid, at least for now. Meeting your ex boyfriend for lunch or coffee is always a good first date.
Picking a casual location for lunch or a nice little coffee shop will allow you to get in, talk to your ex, reconnect with him on a personal level, and then get back home again quickly. Ending the meeting early will leave the both of you wanting more, which will lead to another meeting.
Rule 2: Let Your Ex Boyfriend Do Most Of The Talking
Whenever possible, it's always good to allow your ex boyfriend to do most of the talking. If you've been apart a while, he's probably missing you. He wants to know what you've been up to, so he'll probably ask. Giving him some of the details is fine, but keeping some of them to yourself is also a good idea. By keeping your ex wondering about you, you're giving the impression you have a life of your own - one that you created post-break up. Making him nervous that he might lose you for good is one of the best ways of getting your ex back.
For this reason, steer the conversation back in his direction whenever you can. Let your ex talk about what he's been doing. Then, when the date ends, he'll realize he never really asked you half the things he wanted to... and will immediately need to see you again.
Rule 3: No Matter What - Don't Talk About The Break Up
Talk about work... talk about school... talk about family, friends, even the weather. But no matter what you do, don't EVER talk about the break up on the first date. When you're meeting with your ex boyfriend for the first time in a long while, you do NOT want to get into the same old arguments, talking about the same old things, and maybe even placing blame on each other.
The subject of your break up is off limits. If your ex wants to talk about your past history together, it's actually a good sign that he wants you back. But steer the conversation clear of anything related to your fights, arguments, or any of the disagreements that may have broken you up in the first place.
Rule 4: Keep Things Fun and Comfortable Between You
The goal of the reunion date should be to simply reconnect and realize that the two of you can get along together. You want to have fun with your ex - the same type of playful, flirty fun you used to have when you first began dating each other.
Making your ex comfortable will help make you comfortable as well. Humor helps any situation, and can make any nervousness you feel at meeting your ex boyfriend dissolve quickly away. Try to laugh about old times, especially memories you know that your ex had fun with. The better the two of you get along, the easier it will be for him to ask you out again.
Seeing Your Ex Boyfriend For The First Time After Breaking Up
When it comes to seeing an ex after breaking up with him, there are many aspects to consider. If you want your boyfriend back, you'll need to make sure this little meeting goes off without a hitch.
By keeping him comfortable, keeping the meeting short, and by steering the conversation clear of anything serious, the two of you can get reconnected after a long time apart. If you haven't seen or heard from your ex boyfriend for several weeks or even months, you might think seeing him will be awkward. But what you don't realize? There's lots to talk about that doesn't involve your failed relationship, and that he probably wants to see you as much as you want to see him (if not more).
What Should You Do When Your Ex Boyfriend Won't Agree To See You?
Fixing a breakup requires good timing. With that said, there are some times when it's almost impossible to get a good reaction out of your ex, so you need to avoid pressing him during these times.
If your ex boyfriend hasn't been taking your calls or is generally unresponsive, you'll need a different approach. Be sure to learn these emotional triggers, which can help instantly bring him back into a relationship mindset.
In the end, don't sweat the reunion date. It's a very necessary part of the make-up/reconciliation process, and it will go as smoothly as you let it. Remember to relax, have patience, and let things play themselves out. By being yourself and not trying to push for anything in particular, your ex will relax as well and the two of you will be able to reconnect.
